Wednesday, February 2, 2022

Top 5 Shows I Hate

 Yes, I have done a list compiling the worst shows there, but that's it, shows that already ranked very lowly when it came to reviews so they can technically be considered the worst. This time around, as the title clearly suggests, I want to talk about shows that struck a nerve with me personally. It may not apply to all of you, but hey, if we all abide to the same standards we'd all be making movie reviews on YouTube.

Just one quick rule, I will not feature shows that are meant to appeal to very young audiences. The only shows that'll cut it are those that can be enjoyed by old and young audiences alike. There would've only been one show featured had the rule not been incorporated, and that's some obscure bible cartoon that's the way it was because it was trying so hard to appeal to young viewers. It's so devoid of anything more I can't even do a review of it. Just know it's like a proto-Cocomelon.

Also they have to be full shows, shorts won't cut it even if they have a few parts to it. Single seasons may also apply if they're egregious enough.

With that said, let's get on with the list.

#5: MP4ORCE: Beyond Real

Once again here to remind you the worst cartoon ever exists, well, worst professional cartoon of some degree. Okay saying this is the worst cartoon ever is a stretch. As of yet, only three people covered this, myself included, and the other only briefly when discussing a different show.

What makes this show particularly detestable, is that the crux of it was used for a vanity project which happened to comprise of a revival of Reboot. Let's be real, nobody knew this show existed, so if it didn't land the first time, it wouldn't land the second, and points are docked if you try to ride off of a show people liked to begin with.

Though I never watched the original Reboot, just the fact that even this offends me shows just how vile it all is. I won't stop bringing it up every now and again until more people talk about it. But just know there is nothing to like about this show. I went into great detail on two separate occasions.

#4: Ed, Edd n' Eddy (season 5)

Now don't get me wrong, I love Ed, Edd n' Eddy, and I appreciate how fans of it are willing to call a spade when they see it, but this particular season really got under my skin. I can forgive some of the worser examples of the show's faults in earlier seasons because honestly that's what help built its charm, but I feel like the issues got more apparent by this point.

It just didn't feel the same, Kankers were far more obnoxious, Edd became borderline unlikeable, Ed has arguably lost whatever braincells he had left, Sarah and Jimmy are apparently allowed to go to high school and both are arguably the worst characters, well one above another. Since this is the only full season they go to school, it can be considered its own thing for the sake of this list.

A lot of the show's worst episodes came out at this point, from particularly bad to some of the worst. That one time Danny Antonucci gave someone else the opportunity to direct, we got the show's worst episode, bar none.

The season finale was also undone by a surprise other episode, but at least the movie helped fix things, even if the hat mystery won't ever die.

This made it on the list because it actually nearly made me hate the show. I managed to get out of that thankfully.

#3: Camp Lazlo

It was between this and Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, two shows that were the earliest programs I recalled hating. Camp Lazlo won out, obviously, because you could see the number above. As someone who really liked Rocko's Modern Life, this was a big step down for the show's creator Joe Murray. The man operates backwards, as we went for a show that popularized adult innuendos in kids shows, to a show that was probably held down by executive demands, make this just like SpongeBob so we can get that crowd to watch our network.

If you recall my review of the worst Oh Yeah! Cartoons shorts, you'd see I referred to a character as being Lazloian. If you can't tell this is the show that originated it for me. Lazlo is optomistic and naive, to an insufferable degree, but I feel like there is an air of self-awareness he exhibits. This may seem insignificant, but hear me out. If someone is genuinely naive, they can't pick up on what they're doing wrong, with their good intentions being the drive. I feel like Lazlo fell into these pitfalls so many times I can't help but wonder if these are all intentional.

Why am I focusing on this so much? Well excuse me for focusing on the main character and one we should root for. If the main character sucks, then that accounts for the show as well, there's no payoff to this either. Why experience it when you know you're in for a dour journey?

#2: As Told by Ginger (season 3)

Let's be real, there's more to the show than it's art style. While Ed, Edd n' Eddy can be seen beyond its faults, As Told by Ginger is full of problems, even from the start. Either it was wasted potential or the fact that Dodie exists, and other stuff that's actually objectively bad.

I feel like things came to a head with the third season. Let's be real, Butterflies are Free should've been where things ended. Things got a little more infamous as many of the show's worst episodes are present in this season, and by the time they got to high school, things are different enough that I can call it a different show. Maybe if things did go on longer we could get some resolve to these changes.

If they were brave enough, Darren's ego would lead to his downfall and... insert plot of a Degrassi episode where Rick shoots Drake, only this time he shoots Dodie, or the other Ms. Zorski, or the vice principal, at least two of them are expendable, and not particularly likable.

This is one of the few cases where I welcome the other episodes being moved to Nicktoons to finish out their run, because if I saw these as a kid, I'd probably think nothing of it at first until I see them again as an adult and get agitated. What makes this season particularly egregious is that, let's face it, high school sucked, and marks a point in your life where you want to do stuff but they turn out to be insignificant in the long run. Is being the star quarterback or attractive meaningful if you wind up becoming a used car salesman or convicted for molesting your next door neighbor? It happens.

I give it points for being brutally honest, but either they fall into common trappings or they ramp up the negatives to the point it becomes insufferable to watch. Check out Old School Lane's list of the worst As Told by Ginger episodes, a majority of the episodes that made it on happen to have made the list, I'm pissed Stuff'll Kill Ya didn't make it, but at least people are in agreement the other Ms. Zorski is cancer wrapped in a wheat tortilla.

She and Ginger didn't have the best introduction, but it wasn't enough to justify her often vitriolic attitude. What was it? Is she jealous that her sister was preferred by Ginger (because I'd believe it, if you want to treat people like shit, that's how you'll be seen)? Is it because of racism (imagine if they actually explored black on white racism, people will go crazy)? I wish it was the latter because that's the only way I can see justification for apathy after someone literally got out of surgery. I'm serious, it was as bad as I recalled in the episode.

No matter how insignificant, a character can ruin a show for anybody, and she just built upon how uncomfortable the season was. And it showed just how weak Ginger either has become or been, why else is she still friends with Dodie? And yes, Courtney was treated horribly in this, and she was the most well developed character in the entire series.

All this season did was reaffirm just how fundamentally flawed As Told by Ginger truly was.

#1: Zoey 101

Even before the allegations against Dan Schneider came out, I was never a big fan of his shows. I don't know if it was intuition, but it's amazing what came out. I liked Josh and he suffered a lot of the time, he turned out to be a hell of a lot better than Drake, who's facing allegations himself. I didn't like iCarly mostly because of Sam, and it turns out she suffered the worst behind the scenes. Victorious... well I hated the characters I was supposed to, so it has that in its favor.

Zoey 101 particularly got under my skin. Jamie Lynn Spears has a particularly punchable face, and is certainly not up to par with her sister, who would've been seen as a joke, but now we understand the root of her turmoil, and I'm glad she managed to break from her conservatorship. She also approved some pretty smart lyrics.

But this is a case where I wound up hating everyone on the show. Everyone has a particular air of annoyance, and it felt like they were doing the right thing to feel better about their own selves. Half the time I rooted for Logan. Why did they feed him toilet water? Why did Victoria Justice throw his burger and nibble his ear? Why is Quinn potentially one of Schneiders most prominent victims which makes me reluctant to criticize her? Why is the black character one of two I like? Oh well because he's actually funny and kinda likeable. Well Chase is okay too most of the time. Blonde hair guy... James? Mitchell? Maybe it's guilt by association, he could do with better friends than Zoey and... Mithcelle? I only know Victoria Justice by name, maybe it goes to show how insignificant her character is in the longrun.

The only thing Jamie Lynn Spears is known for is getting knocked up, which plays back into the Schneider business and starring in a crappy Britney Spears biopic, along with any failed attempts at making a name for herself. One time, an MTV cartoon called Good Vibes featured a character with the same surname as Spears, she was a pregnant teenager. A one time character was a hell of a lot more likable than the actual Jamie Lynn Spears.

Can you help me better understand Zoey 101? Because I don't want to ever go back to it.

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