TV pilots are a special thing. Whether they serve as the very birth of a beloved series or just represent a creator at their most raw, before the network opted to trim the fat, you can never go wrong. Most pilots are shown behind closed doors, act as a proof of concept following an old college film, intended for a showcase before they decide it is ripe for a full series, or the pilot becomes the first episode of the series like CatDog, there is already an intended first episode like Ed, Edd n' Eddy's, it could be the second episode like Doug, the sixth like Rocko's Modern Life, or if you're lucky, you get three for the price of one, case in point, the proper first episode of Codename Kids Next Door, its pilot from 2001 and another one released the previous year.
Stuff like Oh Yeah! Cartoons and Random Cartoons tended to feature their cartoons in a vacuum, though whether it be nepotism or genuine interest, we'd get a series... either a full one or just a series of shorts. Stuff on KaBlam! got lucky like Angela Anaconda, and Shorty McShort Shorts did absolutely nothing. But, on Cartoon Network, they committed far more than the others, from What-a-Cartoon to what Cartoonstitute could've been, and even now with the network screening pilots on YouTube, we at least had something to look forward to.
Even beyond that, they individually screened pilots throughout the summers of 2000 and 2001 and the rest is history on both counts. Beyond the pilots that actually got picked up, we all know the pilots that failed with which people sing the praises of on a regular basis.
Who hasn't heard of A Kitty Bobo Show? Frankly I prefer Bremen Avenue Experience.
People talk about the successes and what could've been, but how often do people talk about the absolute failures? Those that deserved to bomb, and as this was a viewer selection deal it would show how unpopular they truly were. From a summation of the sheer incompetence of a future degenerate to a series being dead from the start, I'm gonna go over the top 3 worst Big Picks that deserved to fail.
This is gonna be a combination of three reviews I did in the past, remastered, so yeah, may be in this for a while.
#3: Foe Paws
Let's begin with where Chris Savino got his proper beginning as a creator. After this pilot bottomed out, he became the showrunner for later seasons of Dexter's Laboratory and PowerPuff Girls. I do personally like the later season Dexter's Lab episodes, even if it's from nostalgia, but quite frankly, Chris was, shall I say, a competent hack. Case in point, The Loud House seemed interesting at first, but now, we can see why it's so successful. It's cheap, has one-dimensional characters, lazy writing, among other things.
And then of course he got the boot for being an utter creep, and his only salvation is a bible cartoon on a streaming service too obscure to mention, either that or Chris was to Butch Hartman what Star Giant Productions is to MrEnter, heh, what happened to thou shall not steal lawl.
But, let's forget he gave Nickelodeon another ace in the hole, let's forget how he became the ventriloquist to two notable shows, he could have Powerpuff Girls as far as I care, those people are batshit insane, and above all let's forget about how he is a lower tier degenerate now on a quest for god, Chris, he is a guy making his way in the world and showing us what he can do, it's only the third spot, it can get worse, but I'm getting ahead of myself.
To sum up, Foe Paws sees a cat and dog getting adopted by a wacky owner, hijinks sure to ensure, and they're treated like her children. No, seriously, like children, clothes and all. Now, a simple premise can work if it's at least entertaining. Give it to stuff like Squirrel Boy, Mike, Lu and Og and I guess Ruby Gillman, they're dirt simple but they're not unbearable. However, if there're cracks to the foundation, they're hard to ignore, and ho boy...
First up, stop me if you heard this one before, animals that can talk but cannot be understood by humans, this is not looking to break any new ground. The fact the owner can’t understand Vivian and Rollo is also a problem, and it could give off some pretty dire vibes, as they can’t say otherwise to her, especially when she decides what to do and what they can do, not helping that she treats them like humans, even if she can't understand what they're saying. She really seems like someone that'd serve as an antagonist in a series where strays remain strays, perhaps she learns a hard lesson or we actually get to feel sorry for her as she never got to have kids, maybe even lost them long ago and can't let them go.
If Foe Paws had done something like Larry and Steve where the human can actually understand them, it would honestly make things better, perhaps better flesh out dynamics and actually allow us to feel something for these characters.
But let’s get back to the owner, aka another prominent protagonist that we would see the most often had this been picked up. She is an Italian grandma, which seems fine, until you realize she is a stereotype played straight. So straight she is literally named Mama Mia. Why not Mama Leone, lest Billy Joel is too sophisticated for you. She’s a stereotype, and while that is an issue, it isn’t a defining one, and no show is exempt from having stereotypes, they do tend to have a kernel of truth most of the time.
The problem is that with stereotypes and obvious traits you can see jokes coming right away. If you've seen one, chances are you've seen it all. For instance, an old Italian woman making dinner, oh, is it spaghetti? The most common dish made by Italians? I was gonna say spaghetti and meatballs, those served here, are not Italian. But, while they weren’t created in Italy they were made by Italian immigrants. I know this seems like some random point, but who knows, maybe Mama Mia really is an Italian immigrant, they could've had some opportunities to flesh this out, but this is a Chris Savino cartoon, and the fact that he had to go for such an obvious stereotypical Italian name for her suggests he would've never considered anything more than just a living checklist.
By the way, I'm Italian, and this will be my defense for anyone saying I'm taking this dumb cartoon too seriously.
But that's her, what about everyone else? There's Vivian, who in spite of the name, is actually a male, and leaving it at that can easily be used against me this day and age. I need to specify, Vivian was initially a nameless male cat, until he was adopted by Mama Mia and dressed like a girl and called Vivian. So yeah, he didn't choose a new gender identity, it was forced upon him when it wasn't his choice, I really need to make that clear because I'm not looking to make any more enemies.
Now, in order to soften the blow so to speak, they made Vivian into a grating pessimist, so that way it can gaslight you into thinking Vivian deserves all this. But, much like how Italian stereotypes can telegraph jokes long before they happen, you'd know Vivian is setting him-, I'm gonna say him because that's the identity he goes with, -self up for the punchline. He claims he is the one bought in a buy one get one free sale when it was the dog bought and Vivian's the freebee. He looks to the window for what he assumes to be a vixen, it turns out to be a grotesque old lady.
Oh, and when he is named, he teases the dog for the name he is chosen in an over the top fashion, you get the point. He asks for a lot of shit that happens to him, but he is already not very likable. Here's the problem. Vivian is a main character, and main characters need something for people to root for or make them follow said characters in spite of their many misfortunes. Let's refer to CatDog. Cat goes through a lot of shit, most of it being through his own fault, and yet he's not just a pessimist. He's funny, he loves his brother, he's awkward, well, he has more than Vivian, and we actually have reasons to care about him and put up with him.
If you have Vivian bemoan the conditions he and the dog are put through, it would suggest this is the worst possible scenario to be in. And it kinda makes the dog an ass because he would encourage it.
Speaking of dogs, Rollo. Rollo is here to fulfill the role of the optimist, or in other words act as Vivian's foil. I mean very well, anything to lighten the tension, but whether it's the situation or himself, Rollo, along with being an absolute bore compared to everyone else is flat out annoying, at least indirectly, and when you look deeper into the context behind their situation it just makes him worse. Anything wrong with Rollo comes solely through implication. He enjoys their new living situation when Vivian doesn't, to the point he is ignorant to why Vivian is somehow more jaded than usual, he doesn't see anything wrong with Mama Mia because they have a home now apparently. Either he's selfish or just horribly oblivious.
If you want an example of an optimist done right, refer to Lazlo from Camp Lazlo. I gave the show shit because I believed Lazlo was just blindly happy all the time, then I realized it wasn't so. He's naive, but not oblivious, he is receptive to what's happening around him, he's friendly to a fault, all in all he's just a better realized optimist.
Now, if Vivian and Rollo just put up with their crazy owner, her delusions of them being humans which may be shattered because she got them from a pet store and begins treating them like humans, jamming spaghetti and meatballs down their throats, that's one thing, but they have it where Vivian tries to return to the pet store, but Rollo gets him to stay. That Stockholm Syndrome kicking in there boy?
As for the art direction, in the past I had assumed Chris took heavy influence from Schoolhouse Rock, which ironically another Cartoon Network show did just that with Whatever Happened to... Robot Jones. But looking at this, it seems more like Chris took influence from newspaper comics. The animation features similar stilted movements to his runs on Dexter's Laboratory and PowerPuff Girls, and while it at least stands out from the other pilots, it's not very remarkable. For some more irony, Chris had published a comic strip For Brothers in 2020, and even more, he worked at Spumco at some point, no I'm not kidding.
With that said, this pilot is a double threat. It has a premise that is unappealing, and you'd fear what the rest of the series would've been like had this been picked up, seeing two animals in a dire situation, and this is a comedy. Had this gone to series, throw Mama Mia out of the fold and just have them go between owners constantly, the potential that has could help sustain itself, they go through different owners each episode before returning back to the pet store, situations will vary. Of course Vivian and Rollo need to have their personalities altered in order for us to start caring about them, Vivan needs to be more than just a pessimist, and Rollo needs to have some more awareness, lest episodes just have Vivian babysitting him on a regular basis.
Before I close this off, yes, Foe Paws is a pun, Faux Pas, is a blunder, I imagine Chris just picked the title without any thought to what it meant, in a fault soon to be trumped by Terremoto Heights. It doesn't even live up to the title. Their life is a blunder and yet it's played as a scenario they have to deal with. I mean the internet was still developing, but dictionaries exist man.
But yes, the title ironically spelled out the pilot's fate. Foe Paws, is a Faux Pas.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mTtJlBkack&pp=ygUIZm9lIHBhd3M%3D
#2: My Freaky Family
Hey, remember when dysfunctional families were all the rage? And then for how many shows that did it it became a cliche in itself and thus undesirable? My Freaky Family is basically a key example of that, and somehow on the lower ebb. As another connection to Powerpuff Girls, this pilot was created by John McIntyre, a director on the earlier seasons of Powerpuff Girls.
That aside, lower ebb, what could that mean? My Freaky Family basically takes the worst stereotypes of most dysfunctional families and wraps them into one tight package. You have the delusional housewife, the surly father complete with wife beater, the nagging grandma and that evil older brother. Granted, the youngest in the family happens to be the main character so points for not throwing in a baby to add to the cliches.
But, what does My Freaky Family have to offer? The plot of this sees Nadine, the main girl, attempting to avoid getting a commemorative photo taken before her first day of school. This seems like a fairly petty issue, until you realize this family is basically immortalizing her shame. So it's behind closed doors, but she has to come back to that every day, and it's clear this family will take pictures of first everythings, I'll let you come to your own conclusions on that.
What sets this above Foe Paws is that most of the jokes come off very dark with no effort. Nadine's dad thinks she's behind academically. Not doing anything? How about how she is given scrambled eggs even though she's allergic.
"Eggs? I'm allergic to eggs!"
"But these are my famous scrambled eggs, everybody loves them!"
That is an actual exchange by the way. Am I being too dramatic? What was the punchline? She is too oblivious or wrapped up in her image as a housewife that she would shut out anything that dares to contrast it? Maybe?
The remainder of the episode sees Nadine trying to get to school before that picture is taken of her, and yeah, they're deadset on getting it taken. Nadine is embarrassed, though to be fair she let slip that was her mom. To its credit at least they don't get the picture of her, though now that people know she is attached to that kind of family, I guess they got a premise for that now.
Okay, chances are John based this on most elements of his life. I know Danny Antonucci wrote Ed, Edd n' Eddy with some elements of his childhood in mind, so if John intended to portray his memories, good on him for finding a way to let off that kind of steam, but there's little application for a series, either that or the pilot didn't give the best impression.
There's little familial harmony that, again, means a lot because we'd be seeing these characters on a regular basis. If Nadine can brush off these bad instances by the end, okay, but I question what staying power this would've had if this was ultimately picked. If this was left to viewer opinion, it says a lot if this didn't even come close to getting it.
As for the animation, this honestly seems pretty generic. It animates a bit like PowerPuff Girls, even its art style doesn't feel that unique, you'd swear you saw something similar before. To be fair, McIntyre had involvement in a lot of familiar shows before then, perhaps that rubbed off on this. It's not horrible, but it really doesn't stand out.
Not the worst, and I can say that because this is only number two. Its time now.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lzcEwh-gFcs&pp=ygUQbXkgZnJlYWt5IGZhbWlseQ%3D%3D
#1: Lucky Lydia
About being dead from the start, it's like this. Lucky Lydia had absolutely no potential to be a series. It spelled out that she will always succeed no matter what- I'm getting ahead of myself.
Of all the pilots covered here, this is one of the few that was not produced in-house. It was an American-Australian co-production between Bob Camp and Arthur Filloy, both of which having previously worked on The Ren and Stimpy Show. Now, Bob Camp needs no introduction, but to sum him up, he put more effort into Ren and Stimpy than its own creator... I got nothing else. In this, while Filloy seemed to pull the most weight in terms of story and conception, Camp's biggest capacity is as an executive producer, even getting his own vanity card to that effect.
Interesting fact, this Cartoon Network pilot has the most closing logos compared to the others, to explain, financier, animation studio and creator credit.
Okay enough fluff, let's get into this.
The defining flaw of this show takes a little while to set in. The series centers on Lydia, a girl who is blessed with constant luck, no matter what. It would dawn on you after the first few instances, and then there's the problem. There're no stakes here, we know she is gonna come out on top in the end because she has the kind of luck that would get her there.
It's her defining trait, she has little else to her, and it makes her come off as unintentionally annoying, nothing can get in her way, and if you have that in mind it'll make the plot of this pilot seem far more uncomfortable. The deal here is that she wants to get into a private club, they try to get her to do some challenges, she obviously wins, claims the deed and holds the boys captive as babies.
Remember, she is the protagonist.
I just basically summed it up, but if you need a refresher, Lucky Lydia practically cancels itself out with its plot. There are little to no stakes here, we know she is gonna make it because her luck is gonna bail her out. She just has this luck, there's no plot point, catch, anything that could raise any tension, she'll just brave through with absolutely no effort.
In other words, ever wanted to see what a Mary-Sue is? Lydia is a good example of one, she is also the defining element of this pilot, how could she not be?
And keep in mind, this was intended to be pitched as a series. If Lydia has all this luck and no stakes attached, it's gonna turn out to be an incredibly boring series. If you wanted this to work, Lydia should've been the antagonist, messing with people and thus those bugged would try to best her. Or, what if with every instance of good luck Lydia has it is met with bad luck right after. You don't gotta wonder, because What-a-Cartoon's Awfully Lucky basically epitomizes that. A guy you don't care that much for finds a pearl that gives its holders good luck followed by bad luck. A device, a character you're neutral towards and stakes.
But hey, something like this could be forgivable if the humor's good... it's not, it's borderline non-existent with the most prevalent jokes being sight-gags and subversion in service of Lydia's luck, and they take away more than they add to the quality. The animation is certainly unique with a retro aesthetic, but by the end I'd take Yakkity Yak over it in terms of shows that had UPA's sensibilities in mind.
I gotta say, what was the point of this? Did they assume the Big Pick was an animation showcase rather than a testing ground? Was this a shitpost? What the hell were they going for? All I know is that statistics don't like, either that or the fact that this didn't make the cut reflected just how little people cared for this steaming turd.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjpFU9JvgFQ&pp=ygULbHVja3kgbHlkaWE%3D
Final Thoughts
There're numerous factors to Cartoon Network pilots not making the cut, whether it be budget, a lack of interest or what have you. I have chosen these three pilots because, as they were, there was no potential in any of them to be a series, lest they'd be overhauled considerably. I know a pilot is just a rough idea for a full series, but when the success of it hinges on the audience, you had better make something that'd catch their interest or show there is far more to it that what we've seen.
Grim and Evil and Codename Kids Next Door clearly had more to them, hell even most pilots that never made it only happened because they were either too niche or... something else I'm not sure about. Even so, most of these pilots had another chance in the form of sequels, or devoted followings that persist to this day.
With that in mind these three stick out like sore thumbs, you have a better understanding to why these failed and are probably grateful they did. They seem harmless until you really think about the broader implications they give off.
All I can say is, some pilots are better off unsold, and we'd be worse off if anyone could get any pilot off the ground, and maybe A Kitty Bobo Show is better off as a one-off.
No comments:
Post a Comment