Reflections on My Break

I had decided to take a break from social media, particularly sites that were either the most bothersome and see what it can do for my mental state. I certainly feel better, but I question if I may slip again. If anything, I may just take periodic breaks to keep myself balanced. I'm gonna be saying stuff that may come off as repetitive and petty, but I just want to get this out of my system, and hopefully give you some context to my behavior the past few days. I’m going to hopefully give you a better idea what got this going.

In my time gone, I have also reflected on my behavior before then. When I get into something, I tend to go all in, and a majority of the time I act like an asshole. To those reading this, if I had given you shit before, I'm sorry to most of you. What I mean is, to those I was a dick toward that I came at first, I'm sorry, but to those who responded in a relatively toxic fashion, it's complicated. The best way to respond to a douchebag is to do so in equal measure, so I got what I paid for, and I'm sure they just moved on right away.

What drove me to most of what I did, at least on Twitter, was negativity. I've rarely seen anything of the other extreme, so I just found myself responding to posts or those relevant to a current situation, and one big situation in particular was TheMysteriousMrEnter, but I won't go into what he did as I'm sure everyone is already sick to death of it. For what I did, it wasn't in defense of the review, it was the fact that it was difficult to express an opinion going against the majority without getting slammed for it. I saw it happen to one guy, and even after he removed the tweet, people still went at him, including bigger figures in the community.

Where I stand with it, I do agree the point was absurd, my issue is how quickly it was ran into the ground and that it can act like a free pass for just about anyone. I’m getting mixed signals by people bringing up his past fuck ups to try and justify that frenzy, that tells me they’re not doing it to be funny. That’s not my scene, at least I don’t want it to be. I can’t find humor in i, anymore at least.

It's silly, but when you realize people you look up to or those poised as being friendlier members of a community, or perhaps those who have gotten away with degeneracy just because they share the same opinions as the community at large, it gets kinda depressing, you can get away with just about anything as long as you meet proper criteria. There's also nothing anyone can really do about it, just because it doesn't seem fair that doesn't mean I suddenly have permission to go after people.

I didn't handle this well at all, and I found myself annoying people more often then not. I'm not gonna blame anyone for not telling me how they felt sooner, I'm just gonna accept where I went wrong and try to be better about it. It was there that I decided I wanted to take a break from social media, I came to the conclusion after having a little time to reflect on my behavior that day, and thus I would take the next two weeks off to decompress.

One thing that really proved important in helping me get over my frankly petty animation gripes was an underlying truth to Enter. He takes the good with the bad, then there's the bigger picture. Even in spite of all of the bullshit, he is still posting videos, survived multiple controversies and is just still going. Only thing stopping him is a loss of interest, or his channel, whatever may come first. I think he grew desensitized to a lot of stuff occurring to or around him and everyone just pulls the weight.

If these things don't bother him, why should I let it bother me? Rather than take the negative and go after strangers on the internet over a difference in opinion, when I could take the positive and laugh at how they're still trying to justify laughter through clenched teeth? I got over it, and I can only hope I can start the new year with a positive outlook.

Also, for those of you wondering where I stand with Turning Red, I still don't like the movie, but if you do, that's fine. I’m gonna steer clear of it the best I can, I’m not gonna harp on people who like it going forward, I already get the idea behind the drama so I have no interest in seeing videos about it, I already get the idea, and it's not gonna change my mind. I don't like the movie, better yet, I have no desire to watch it knowing that I won;t like it, and it was well before the situation occurred. I won't pick fights and I'll try to be better about my perspectives. For YouTube, if I see any videos about it, I'm just gonna assume they came out when Enter's video was new, and that Twitter is the only place pushing it. I won’t go further than that.

Now, this is no guarantee that I'm gonna be perfect the entire year, we all fuck up every now and again. If anything, I may take periodic breaks, maybe not from the internet entirely but just relegating myself to areas assuredly positive. Also need to remind myself not to go on Twitter or search certain people on YouTube, it may cause my brain cells to shrink. But on Twitter, I'm giving everyone weeks notice to add me on Discord or follow me anywhere else before I shut the account down, already putting it to a vote. YouTube can be annoying with what it shows in recommendations or searches, but the moment I stop using Twitter, it's as if a weight's lifted.

Thanks for reading, let’s see what 2023 has to offer.

Top 3 Episodes I Want to Avoid

Childhood trauma, or just unpleasant memories, everyone has them, you're not special. Simply put, throughout my childhood I've been exposed to stuff like Guns N' Roses, thrillers like Requiem for a Dream and The Sopranos, let's just say kid me was quite surprised with the end of Member's Only, but let's not get off track.

Everyone, no matter what, has that one show or episode they do not want to go back to for whatever reason, as in directly avoiding the episode however possible, like you've seen enough to get the gist of it, it is exactly how you remembered it, maybe even worse, and sometimes the episode is just so effective that if you seek to criticize it then you'd come off as petty, but you need some outlet to discuss it.

These are three episodes of three different shows that I do not want to revisit, knowing what's in them and what made me uncomfortable. Episodes would be ranked by the likelihood of me going back to them.

Honorable Mention

I won't include Helga's Makeover because I discussed that in my top 5 list of the worst Hey Arnold episodes, even though this is also one I want to avoid for the fact that it's exactly how I remember it, its off nature and all. However, people would often claim the first season is more of an experimental period and thus the writing was not entirely on the wall, the episode can be forgiven for that, I just don't find it enjoyable. I can watch the Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy episode Who Killed Who? In spite of sharing a similar off premise, that one was just kinda stale and thus the message suffocates what the show was known for.

Speaking of Billy and Mandy, Get out of My Head is another honorable mention. Let me tell you, a majority of the Grim and Evil era was much darker than I remembered, okay not that dark, just in certain areas. I avoided this at first, but I kinda grew to accept it, realizing Billy had faced far worse or similar punishments Hell, one of them, Spider's Little Daddy, became one of my favorite episodes. But I think the reason this episode ranks lower is because Billy's stupidity wasn't firmly established, but nevertheless I'm not ready to write the episode off just yet.

Okay here we go.

#3: The Simpsons: War of the Simpsons

I needed a filler spot, and this was it. This placed number one on my worst episodes of The Simpsons list, and I did a full review of it not too long ago. This came out in the show's second season, when things were starting to gel, so no season 1 quirkiness. How bad is this episode for me, I couldn't even make it through a short clip on YouTube, my fight or flight kicked in and that was it.

Even compared to older and some later episodes, this felt off. It was the first episode to focus on the dysfunction between Homer and Marge's marriage, but previous episodes implied Marge at best settled, it just felt wrong, and that is the one term I can use to sum up the entire episode. This was long before we got the flashbacks to Homer and Marge's younger years, as if the writers wanted to make sure this didn't take any further prominence.

If you want my full thoughts, check out my review of the episode.

#2: Hey Arnold!: Mugged

Hey Arnold is a show I have a very mixed opinion on, I love the episodes I do, but there're a lot of faults I need to hold it up to, when Hey Arnold fucks up, it tends to fuck up hard, though my choice for the worst episode is not the usual one, and Mugged is not a bad episode, if it was it would've landed on my old list.

This episode didn't land on here because it's bad, far from it. This is an instance where an episode managed to get it right, maybe too right. The episode basically dealt with a power trip Arnold went on after learning how to fight from Gertie, right down to the Taxi Driver reference and him attacking an innocent bystander. The one thing that set me off was the confrontation after the latter, not that Arnold didn't deserve it, it was actually an effective way to knock him off his high horse. It just worked a bit too well, and the fact that this was released during the show's first season, which is when a show is at its most experimental, they pull out whatever stops they saw fit, hell even Caesar got in on it. For me, it perfectly represents a blow to one's ego, their idealized reality shattering when they see the true extent of what they have done, and it's far from pleasent.

It's funny how the five people that confront Arnold would be seen again in later episodes, old guy with a moustache and Martha (short haired lady) would be seen in Das Subway, the latter being seen more prevalently in later episodes. I guess the blue baseball cap kid got his design tweaked in Harold's Bar Mitzvah or I misremembered? Of course this was long before Caesar started answering the phone, and if you're a Hey Arnold fan you'd know what I'm talking about.

Long story short, the first season was weird, and this is an instance of something working far too well.

#1: Rugrats: Pickles vs. Pickles

I probably talked about this long ago, probably not I dunno, lol. Rugrats is no stranger to dark moments, especially with its pre-Dil seasons. Rugrats featured some pretty interesting nightmare sequences, it was certainly distinct, that along with its humor. Ironically, Angelica's Worst Nightmare isn't that scary to me, even as a kid all the way to now. But what would I consider my most disturbing episode? Well, you can see the title. Pickles Vs. Pickles has never placed on any list regarding creepiest nightmares, which I kinda get as people tend to gravitate more toward the more fantastical ones.

One edge Pickles Vs. Pickles has toward other episodes in my opinion is its realism. As a kid this would not bother anyone, but as an adult, it hits differently. The episode basically cemented Angelica as the brat she is, though to her credit she does have some fans, and represented Drew's inability to lay the hammer down, which ironically he did in earlier in the series, and he managed to be fine, hell, he was far more stern there.

Basically, this basically represents Drew's inability to truly control his daughter and how she practically has free reign under his roof. The fact that this was all a manipulation ploy that has been done multiple times before suggests Drew had this nightmare multiple times, or Angelica had better luck nixing the other foods previously, who knows?

More complicated answer, it's a psychological thriller that basically says a parent sucks at it because they bend to the will of their children and that it is something that can happen in real life, the lack of being able to curb bad behavior so to speak. More simple answer, the judge makes me uncomfortable, how easily he is able to be swayed to let Angelica rep herself and his insistence that she is entirely innocent. It's funny that he is made to resemble Thurgood Marshall, it's almost as if someone got paid some hefty hush money. Now sure, this could've been a sign something was wrong, but... eh screw it, I'm not freaking out over a monster, I'm freaking out over something that can possibly happen, possibly. If it were to happen the judge would have to be a huge pedophile, which is arguably more creepy. If the Rugrats reboot ever remade episodes from the original, how much do you wanna bet that the judge would be modeled after Clarence Thomas?

Also this is one of the few Rugrats episodes to make use of an alternative end credits theme, they obviously went for a more sinister approach here. By that point, after my revisitation of it, I had my fill and I never wanted to see it again.

And that's about it.

Ed, Edd n' Eddy's Useless Season

 Okay, this isn't the first time I ever talked about the fifth season, but chances are it was a very rough take that I will only now put right. I used to be a big fan of Ed, Edd n' Eddy, well I still am, though I don't tune into old episodes. The show is over, the fandom is surprisingly well behaved, and I believe the show is superior to the shit people latch onto these days, for one thing it's not corporate, and no I'm not gonna explain what I mean by that.

But it's not all perfect, obviously. Nobody is reluctant to bring up any of the show's shortcomings, but there was one hangup I have with the show that persisted for so long. It seems like a petty thing to complain about, but the last season of Ed, Edd n' Eddy was so... not good, it actually convinced me that I just wasn't a fan of the show, when that is not the case.

To be fair, I'm not saying one season is better than the other, bad episodes are evenly spread out between seasons, and this wasn't necessarily out of Danny Antonucci's control, he went along with what seemed to be right, I mean aside from going digital, go drawn or go home. I really don't like the fifth season, and I feel it not happening would be inconsequential, and it seems I may not be alone with that, as most EEnE diehards actually liked my Tumblr post with the same opinion, and a common consensus is that it has some good episodes, some bad ones, or they're just happy to get more out of their favorite show.

I'm gonna go over why I don't like the fifth season of Ed, Edd n' Eddy, and why I believe it is expendable.

My Experience

I watched Cartoon Network during the early-2000s, so I was able to catch episodes of the fifth season when they were out. I have seen plenty of the older seasons' episides, I played Candy Machine Deluxe and Spin Stadium whenever I could, and I was basically ready for the long ride with the show.

When I saw the episodes new, I'll admit, I did like some of them, even those that would go on to be criticized later on, but even as a kid, something about most of the episodes felt... off, and this had stuck with me ever since then, to the point I found myself avoiding reruns of episodes I didn't like.

So no, I'm not doing this just for some contrarian cred, even as a kid I didn't like the fifth season that much, and that hasn't changed frankly.

Last Season Curse

People have often used the term seasonal rot to note shows that gradually began to crumble in its later years, and yes, I know this point is used ad nauseum, but for ever common complaint lies a kernel of truth. For every final season, it often reflects a lessened budget, like with ChalkZone or Real Ghostbusters for instance, or a creative director change, like the Chris Savino seasons of Dexter's Laboratory and PowerPuff Girls, not counting the Games era of Ren and Stimpy because let's be real, they didn't need John Kricfalusi, well, after he made the charaters. It's not always gonna be bad, but if you've been watching the show for a while, you're bound to pick up on a few differences. Seasonal rot does not always mean a show's last season sucks, it means this is a sign that either the creatives were worn to the bone with it, or the networks wanted it off as soon as possible, with a creative change only occurring if the original one steps down.

Danny was with the show all the way to the end, and that was for the better, he was always around to direct the episodes, but the one time he didn't during this season, we got what is often considered to be the worst episode of the entire series, or at least one that lands somewhere in the top five.

Some of the spirit of the previous seasons has been kept intact, but it is mixed in with some very noticeable tweaks that take away from that experience, often trumping what made the show so popular in the first place, and falling into the same trap that most shows do with new writers going off of notecards or struggling with ideas or stripping character personalities away.

The Little Differences

Now what do I mean by spirit? I mean the slapstick comedy in an otherwise normal setting. Danny, or someone, has said they avoid the prospect of characters growing up to preserve the timelessness of the series, which makes sense. The summer setting may also play into the timelessness by ridding any prospect of time moving forward, this shit could happen in the span of a few days or so and none would know the difference.

So obviously I object to the school setting.

I'm not gonna go all Mario fan on this, but I do have my complaints. That timeless setting, by implying that summer is over and having the kids go to school, it sorta takes away from the timelessness the writers were going for. If the show got more seasons, maybe someone would've celebrated their birthday, maybe we would've seen the parents, then you realize The Eds are Coming and Mission Ed Possible, Rock a Bye Ed doesn't really count as it was some depiction of Jonny 2x4 for the sake of the plot.

It's such simple things that were unfortunately cast aside, and so close to the finish-line too. Now look, I know this may sound like I'm making a big deal, fine, but I dunno, what do these changes add to the show at large? Granted, it's not just throwing in new characters on a whim, I like how creative they got to avoid showing any new characters, but if anything this marks a contrast between this and earlier seasons because you rarely saw any other instances in the older episodes. Keep this in mind.

The football episode shows the best and worst of making use of a limited cast for so long. While the Lemonbrook football team are depicted by shoulders, we see shots of a crowd barely shown in, with the Kankers singled out. It just looks awkward, but like, did we need a football episode in Ed, Edd n' Eddy? That episode sucked balls, I'm sorry.

Our Friends in Name Only

And of course I need to get into how the characters feel just as off. To its credit, the characters have more consistency than other characters from shows that slipped into its terminal days, either that or they were more subtle about it. About the only major change I noticed was Ed, who turned out to be far more annoying than he was in the past, either because he tends to speak louder or may have lost more braincells than we were led to believe.

The big problem with the characters, at least for me, is the writing. The stories they are put into either drive them to over the top extremes rarely or never seen in previous seasons, and of course those on the lower end suffer the worst. Nobody likes Sarah, and of course she pulls a devastating fast one in "The Ed is Falling" or whatever the sky is falling episode name was. It's a Sarah plot without anything more to make it stand out, basically the 55% people don't take away from episodes like that.

And I gotta ask, why are Sarah and Jimmy in the same grade as everyone else? Otherwise why have them go to school if you're gonna treat it like it's still summer? It's almost as if this makes no sense even by an over the top cartoon's standard.

All I can say about Kevin is that he is a contributing factor to Smile for the Ed being seen as one of the worst episodes in the show, and yeah, seeing it brand new as a kid, all I can say is you had one job. On the other hand, maybe this was Danny's way of messing with the network, showing them what would happen if you separate him from the show. If that's true, that is clever, but it may've worked far too well.

But the one character I feel that suffered the worst because of the writing, was Edd. Much like how the season convinced me I didn't like the show, this season convinced me I didn't like Edd. The biggest draw here is when Edd smugly leaves Eddy to suffer for what he did or was associated with, even being involved with most of Eddy's misfortunes, or at least the no neck chump business. If you want to quit, just do so Edd, you're supposed to be the smart one right?

You may think 'oh, you see though, it's his way of showing he has backbone, just like in Momma's Little Ed.' And I can understand where you're coming from, but Eddy deserved it at the end, more importantly because he targeted Edd directly.

Really, the best way to compare Edd in most season five episodes is Sorry, Wrong Ed, the similarities are astounding, namely Edd's I don't give a shit about a guy I'm possibly friends with. If this was to set up some big argument, like in Big Picture Show, it wouldn't work because what set him off there was Ed and Eddy screwing with him during the journey to Bro. If it was as you thought it was, the series proper would've ended with Edd joining the Cul De Sac kids, arguably darker than the fourth season finale, because at least there the trio was still in effect.

It feels like sometimes the writers had it out for Eddy. We had some more brutal takedowns by the Kankers, even his own friends would turn against him, something was definitely not right with this, but what do I know?

The Core Element

I'd like to touch upon the slapstick real quick, I'm sure someone is gonna bring that up as a consistent element to the show. Yes, the sight gags and slapstick are here, but compared to those in the older seasons, even these feel off. Sure, they do happen, but... best way I can put it is that the older seasons had some slight restraint, pulling it off when you'd least expect it or having a really good gag pulled. Somehow, the fifth season feels even more cartoony, with faces and gags done that I would have never expected to see in older episodes.

It doesn't feel like they were included because they suited the series they were part of. In this season, it felt like they were included for the sake of being included, but it's as if the writers forgot their own work, or the network demanded more of it that we go overboard most of the time.

Check out an old episode, then one of the fifth season episodes, and tell me if you see something similar.

Its own

Interestingly, it was here that the show transitioned to digital animation, so me going on about the little differences hones in on how alien this season feels compared to others. With the gag execution, the treatment of most characters and the common setting, you can remove this season from the show and, really, what harm would it do? Anything new that occurred had done so in this season anyhow.

But you may be thinking, well without the fifth season, we wouldn't get Big Picture Show. Okay, maybe you have a point, but by then Ed, Edd n' Eddy was still very popular so I'm sure we would've gotten the movie regardless of the fifth season occurring or not. Especially so, since the movie occurred in the Summer, when the older seasons did. The use of digital animation in it helps make the spectacle more believable and feel like a grand finale. For one thing it looks better than The Loud House Movie, possibly even the Casagrandes Movie.

The fifth season has similar animation to Big Picture Show, and that dulls the spectacle aspect just a tad. The fact the fifth season throws in a new setting placement and hints of other characters ruins the mystique the movie would offer, in terms of the Eds exploring the world outside of the Cul De Sac, seeing small hints of new people, especially Bro at the end. Now, of course the kids make peace at the end, so that is a good thing at least, but we could've come to that without the fifth season.

If anyone was gonna bring up releasing the movie earlier because there would be no new content between when the movie came out and the fifth season did, how about a compromise? They could waste less time on a, quite frankly divisive season and just produce the holiday specials and participate in CN Invaded, new content in small increments, building up to a grand finale. I won't say some traces of the fifth season's writing didn't get into this movie, but at most it feels like the spirit of the older seasons was kept. Hell, even the over the top gags make more sense as this was a TV film with higher ambition than the previous seasons.

And I'm sure someone is gonna say if we didn't have season five things would end on a very dour note thanks to Take This Ed and Shove It's ending. But let's be real, you can wonder about that. It's not tragic, just a sarcastic yearn for lost youth, by this point everyone was on good terms and just got old. People say the last episode of the fifth season was a good finale, but honestly it felt kinda forced, and it was as if Danny gave an exasperated sigh of relief that he was finished with it. It was like a wet fart basically, especially since, lol, that wasn't even the last episode, and I don't mean Big Picture Show, I mean the lost episode that came from the proposed sixth season, of course they were planning more, but something happened and we never got it. Maybe somewhere, it was because the fifth season was such a groaner that people feared what other seasons would entail.

Final Thoughts

I understand Ed, Edd n' Eddy is a heavily respected show, and I can certainly agree with it. But even as a kid, I didn't like the fifth season's episodes very much. It felt like the show in name only, and it made me feel like I wasn't a fan of the show anymore. It has in quality what it has in expendability, and had this never come out, beyond the holiday specials, I think it would've made Big Picture Show a hell of a lot more satisfying.

Campfire Stories Review

 What makes It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia so good is the chemistry between the actors. This is owed to them having worked on different projects together beforehand. For instance, Rob McElhenney and the lawyer both appeared in a YooHoo commercial, that also featuring the original actress for Dee Reynolds in the pilot, Rob and Charlie Day would appear at separate times in Law and Order, and they would gradually come together in ER, then in 2003, they would get to work on the pilot, as it gradually became what it is now.

However, Rob and Charlie had worked together on something relatively earlier, and this film is credited to how they originally met. So, if there wasn't a Campfire Stories, would there ever have been an It's Always Sunny in Philadelpha?

Background

Campfire Stories is an anthology film released direct-to-video in 2001. It was based on an independent comic book series put out by Don Oriolo, and if that name is familiar, I literally talked about him in my last review, the guy behind Coconut Fred. The film was put out by Velocity Home Entertainment, who had also put out an early Uwe Boll movie by the name of Blackwoods. The film was divided to three directors, and while this wasn't their only rodeo, there isn't anything notable I can list off of them here.

Aside from Charlie and Rob, apparently Perez Hilton was in this, though this was within his first year of acting. The film was shot in New Jersey and apparently was the start of two actors' careers, that's about it. For a while this movie was tricky to find... for free, but in recent months, I got lucky and someone posted it on YouTube, and after I had finished grad school I figured I'd unwind and check out this movie, as well as another called Out of Bounds, but for another time.

What can you expect? Well sit around the fire and let's find out.

The Movie

One thing that bugged me about the start is that we're treated to a two minute intro involving a talking skull done in ultra cheap CGI, trying to overhype the rest of the movie, but then we finally get to the wraparound sections. Charlie and another guy with a speech impediment I guess, he's weird, get a flat and stranded with a girl. As they attempt to find help, they happen upon a desolate campsite and encounter Ranger Bill.

This would be a time to hedge some bets on what the big ol' conclusion is. Is Ranger Bill a psycho killer? Did the three somehow die on the way? Ddi they prevent a realtor from meeting a dealine? But let's not jump to assumed conclusions, this is a cheap rental, I'm giving it a shot.

A tow truck is called and Bill decides to tell the three stories while they wait, I mean this is Campfire Stories so at least we didn't lose that out of the gate. Because we didn't have any summaries of the stories available elsewhere, I didn't know what to expect out of what the tales would consist of, so I had low expectations.

The first story details an escaped mental patient who is tortured at his ward. I'd question if this is true, but have you've even been to Turn-About Ranch or Provo Canyon Boarding School? The director is onto something it seems. The guy would take on a job as a school janitor years later, and some jocks, led by someone who would be better suited as a water or towel boy, harass the janitor to justify the scary element of the story to come soon. After the janitor steals the kid's backpack, he decides the best course of action is to murder him.

He and a few others head out to find him, and yeah they're gonna get picked off one by one. Not even a castration can be considered subversive here, lest the janitor hates when people piss on trees. So of course, the kid gets left alone and after trying to make peace, he backs down and now he's going to go through similar torture, and his girlfriend is dead apparently.

Pretty standard revenge tale, I feel some of it is a bit forced such as the conflict, but I guess the other kills make sense as they joined the dogpile. I'll give Bill the benefit of the doubt of this being a warm-up, though I gotta say it would've been more interesting to have the three share their own stories, stuff that would give viewers a firmer idea on their mentalities or whatever, but that's just me.

The next story details some teens, and it's quite obvious they're crooks I mean look at their outfits, we can't be subtle here. The teens see a Native American enter a restaurant, and they feel like killing somebody today, must've objected to him not wanting the change for a fifty. It is here that the bad CG effects return with a vengeance, not for a lack of quality but because there's so much happening without rhyme or reason. It seems like he summons a snake via a ceremony, but he gets strangled and it turns out the teens did that. Was this meant to be a warning? If so why didn't he do something sooner? This would've made more sense as a prediction rather than a representation of what happened.

And look, it's teens in a horror scenario, you know what that means? Getting high. They do some puffs on a staff the guy had and begin to see more of the so-so CG in this, and they trip harder than anyone I've ever seen, so do they die? Actually no, I had expected them to go that route, but there is one tell that I only then realized was there. It began at a diner with multiple old people, one was apparently dead or non-existent because he was completely still. If you haven't guessed, the teens are made old, and their youth goes into the Native American. I dunno, is this a more acceptable fate? I mean they didn't die at the end, but this reminds me of that one episode of Tales from the Darkside that I don't seem to like.

This consists of three stories, and we're already on the third, and this one is where Rob comes in. In this, two couples stay at a house haunted by the ghost of a relative to one of the girls. This one is fairly slow and kinda hard to really keep up with. The girlfriends reveal to have been caught on tape by the guys in their pranks and they want to get payback... eventually. The girls get them to play hide and seek and blindfold the boys, but then a killer enters the fray. Is it the guys? Is it one of the girls? Is it that deputy that randomly showed up?

Well... not necessarily? Everyone gets killed except for the girls, but then the last girl gets killed and... apparently... the one girl was possessed and killed everyone. I liked the transition at the end, but, I dunno. At least the other ones benefited from being more straightforward. This needed a little extra elbow grease, so to speak

And at the end, with the expectancy of Bill turning out to be a psycho killer still out their, the tow truck arrives, and they all leave. Forgot to mention that at the start Charlie and the other guy were on the way to a party, and the one place that has a working phone is where they were trying to go in the first place. But then oh lawd, Bill is the bartender, and everyone in the stories turns out to be real, and we assume Charlie and the other guy get murdered. I didn't know what to expect, but the girl turning out to be evil was admittedly a twist I didn't see coming. The writers actually made this twist seem surprising, at least in my opinion.

The credits role and we get to see pages from Don's comic, and that's about it.

Final Thoughts

Okay, so for a shorter amount of tales, a lack of predictability or heavy-handed socio-political allegories and not being treated like an idiot the entire time, this is automatically better than American Nightmares.

This is a cheap movie through and through, respectable for its ambition but otherwise having little to show for it. I can respect it for being a little passion project, and of course I've seen much worse. But at the end, perhaps had it not been for this movie, Rob wouldn't have met Charlie and we might not've got It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

Now if you'll excuse me, I saw this guy pay for a coffee and not ask for change for a fifty, and now I feel like committing murder before meeting a girl who was possessed by a psycho grandmother who was murdered in her very house 100 years ago tonight.

LTA: Coconut Fred

 I wouldn't say its been a while since I did a review, but there is a considerable gap between this and my last. A lot is happening in my life, I'm set to finish my last term in grad school this Sunday, I'm waiting for an update on a part time job and I'm gonna celebrate by binging some movies on Tubi and YouTube, and since I'm facing some writers block on my last assignment, I figured I'd vent about something.

Remember Coconut Fred: Fruit Salad Island? Me neither. It was that year I moved into a new house, at that point I was just watching Cartoon Network and never really had a reason to watch KidsWB. First I ever heard of it was by chance when I was googling KidsWB's program list, long before this show became a whipping boy of some degree.

I'll get into a contributing factor to me making this review later, but for now, back then I saw at least two episodes in full, Bad Apple, and something about a tropical resort. I had some experience with the show, and I still feel like there's little to show for it. But let's get right into it.

What is?

The mid-2000s saw a small rise in shows with overly optimistic main characters in summery or tropical settings, ballpark to around 2004 when the SpongeBob movie was released, or perhaps when the show was at its peak, before it killed everyone's brains. It's not definite, but imagine if other creators assumed the show was gonna end after the movie, and they wanted to create the next big thing to fill the hole set to be left, a lot of faces would go red over the hindsight.

The show is credited to two creators, Don Oriolo and Sammy Oriti, with development credited to Ray DeLaurentis. Oriti has a very thin filmography, to say the least. He is tied to two obscure films, and this is the only cartoon he ever worked on. Oriolo has a more interesting past, having worked on Campfire Stories, a cheap horror anthology which is notable for being where Charlie Day met Rob McElhenney, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

However, Oriolo does have some experience with animation, primairly working on The Twisted Tales of Felix the Cat and other stuff relating to the property. Oriti and Oriolo do have a big connection, where Oriti was given a special thanks on Felix the Cat Saves Christmas. Oriolo was also behind I Am a Gummy Bear, the music video and the movie. So, quite an oddball pair and one has dirtier hands than the other.

They conjured up a concept and pitched it to someone in the business, in this case, Ray DeLaurentis, and what has he done? Well aside from some work on the 80s revival of Alfred Hitchcock Presents and Providence, he created and wrote the Bubsy pilot, was a common writer on the later seasons of Fairly Odd Parents, wrote at least one episode for Bunsen is a Beast, also wrote for Shaggy and Scooby Doo Get a Clue, whatever was wrong with it, oh yeah, and he wrote Bah Humduck!, the worst Christmas Carol adaptation of all time.

On the upside he has also worked on Xaolin Showdown and Ozzy and Drix, among other stuff that may be considered decent. It seems beforehand he had worked at Warner Bros. Animation hence how this landed in KidsWB's crosshairs.

What makes this show interesting is that it features both American and Canadian voice actors. Our lead is played by Rob Paulsen, keep that in mind, and I believe one character was played by Danny Cooksey. For the rest, we have Michael Donovan, who has gone between American and Canadian productions, Brian Drummond, the first voice of Knuckles the Echidna, Tracey Moore, one point Princess Peach as well as The Geek from Sam and Max: Freelance Police, Kelly Sheridan, who played Diana in Martin Mystery, Britt McKillip, who played Hannah in the Scary Godmother movies, and lastly Eric Bauza, who just two years prior played Stimpy in Ren and Stimpy: Adult Party Cartoon, and would later lent his voice to Slab in Cans Without Labels, the final nail in the coffin for John Kricaflusi. He's also in far too much stuff to mention. He was once based in Canada, only appearing on Adult Party Cartoon because one of the studios behind the animation was based in that country, and the rest is somehow history.

What About?

This is a comedy involving an overly optimistic and naive coconut attempting to spice up life on a tropical island full of living fruits, and of course one guy will have none of it. It seems every episode operates in a bubble, nothing occurring being of any consequence in another.

The first episode I saw, I forgot the title of, and... it wasn't anything to write home about. It helped introduce me to most key characters, for however basic they are. Not even something made for kids in mind, but are you telling me three dimensions is too mature for children? I'm just saying.

However, it was when I saw another episode that things went south, and I became better acquainted to Fred's brand of annoyance, either that or I saw how weak the writing of the show could be. Latter first, they incorporated a running gag where a bully calls Fred a mean name, but it turns out there is an existing character with that name and Fred assumes that's who he's referring to. The former, it's how Fred goes about carrying out the jokes, naivety can only get you so far, and the only way its constant use can work is if the character happens to be aware of it and is just using it to get a rise out of people. I'm just saying, regardless of it being a TV show sometimes you go through something so many times you attempt to rationalize it so you can justify the time you wasted.

But cards on the table, that was the last episode I saw in full, I gave up on a third one and years later, someone did a review of the show.

That's really all I can say about the show, it's annoying and there's no nuance to it, the plots are too weak to hold over flat personalities, likely dumbed down for a lack of true thought, owed to pedigrees of mediocre productions, or in two instances, having little connection to the medium at all. However, that isn't to say a cartoon is automatically going to suck if someone involved has no experience, but that really only applies to writers.

For instance, there's an episode of CatDog, Sneezie Dog, whose writer only had credits to live-action productions, and that episode was decent. There's a Hey Arnold! episode, Magic Show, written by a novelist who had no other experience with cartoons. It can be done, but it depends on what you're bringing to the table.

This is basically the opposite of Mike, Lu and Og, as in compared to another show set on an island that is considered mediocre at best, this is worse than that. Mike, Lu and Og at the very least had more experienced animators and artists, or maybe I'm trying to say something nice about it before the influx of negative reviews bury it, and because I did a review of it that's now lost to time.

But to give a proper summary, this show is like a beehive on a tree well out of walking range. It isn't doing anything, and interacting with it is always gonna be consequential.

But that's not why we're here

There's a bigger reason why I decided to make this, and why it's classified as a "Let's Talk About" rather than a review. There has been an ongoing stigma against this show, which to this day I still don't understand. This is apparently a rip-off of SpongeBob SquarePants.

Now, look, I'm probably the last person who would ever consider something a rip-off. Hell, I unironically watch Irate Gamer and consider AVGN to be overrated and overprotected, why else do people suddenly not have the time to watch a documentary detailing a decline in quality? My point is, I've stopped taking the rip-off label seriously long ago, so when something is accused of being one, I'm always going to see it with some level of skepticism.

Which is good, because considering this show a rip-off is a stretch so big that it'd be easier to call MrEnter a rip-off of Spax3. It's enough to vindicate the sheer volume of stupid that hit Johnny Test, and many asses are still stinging from that era, at least people are becoming kinder to earlier seasons of it though.

Now, I didn't take it seriously at first, I just thought this was general idiocy on the Reception Wiki's part, which is where I first heard of it, but no, people are dead set on framing it as a rip-off.

But let's look into the accusations, or the bigger ones. They went out of their way to claim characters are rip-offs of others.

Coconut Fred is considered a rip-off of SpongeBob, the character I mean. Coconut Fred is not a frycook, let alone employed in a consistent job. He does not have any hobbies that consist of catching things with nets. He does not have a pet that is the equivalent of a cat. He does not have proper buck teeth. He does not have blue irises. He is not square nor is he a sponge. Also, you're basically implying SpongeBob is insufferably annoying if you think Fred is a copy of him.

Slip and Slide are considered rip-offs of Patrick on the grounds of both being idiots. They're two characters, they have a clear Southern drawl, and few strokes of genius. Otherwise by their logic, every dumb character is a rip-off of Patrick.

Mr. Greenrind, you would think would be considered a rip-off of Squidward, but no, people call him a Mr. Krabs rip-off. I've seen only one episode with Mr. Greenrind, he's not greedy, he doesn't own a restaurant, and basically you've never seen a grumpy man in your life.

This last one is absolutely hilarious, Bingo Cherry, a sentient cherry who can speak proper English and works as an assistant to the lead grump... is apparently a rip-off of a house pet. When I first heard the claim of this being a rip-off, seeing the reasons, I thought it was just an elaborate joke poking fun at the Johnny Test hate crowd, but no, this is considered serious enough.

Next, the setting, Coconut Fred takes place on an island, above water. SpongeBob takes place in a city, under water. Coconut Fred and other characters are fruits, SpongeBob characters are fish or some variation of existing sea creatures.

I'll give the Johnny Test crowd some credit, it's quite a coincidence that the smartest characters in that show happen to be red-heads with glasses, maybe that's why Slip and Slide were considered rip-offs based on that technicality?

But fine, I'll play your game, I'll go one ahead and say this isn't a rip-off of SpongeBob, this is more like a rip-off of Camp Lazlo, but let me explain.

Lazlo and Fred are insufferably annoying naive optimists, Chip and Skip and Slip and Slide are dumb as dirt twins, Mr. Greenrind and Lumpus are grumpy leaders of their base of operations and are at odds with the insufferably annoying naive optimists, and both have impish sidekicks who often side with the insufferably annoying naive optimists.

It's honestly hilarious how people are quick to suddenly make comparisons where they don't usually fit, but are just as quick to ignore more blatant similarities for other characters. For instance, Bessie Higgenbottom and Penny Leftowitz give off some clear SpongeBob and Patrick vibes, and I saw at least one person immediately deny it. Either people are blind or they want to protect those quirky girls Twitter users like to wax over.

Sorry about that tangent, I wanted to get that off my chest for a long while.

Now, you may be thinking that I'm ignoring an elephant in the room, that MrEnter probably got these claims going. But let me say this, he didn't originate many of the attitudes animation fans had at the time, he just helped them to spread. People have already hated Breadwinners and the new SpongeBob episodes long before Enter gave their thoughts, now yes, I hold him up for not helping quell those claims sooner, but there is one person who is consistently credited to getting the rip-off claims going, and what Enter probably referred to in his review.

Not a reviewer, not someone on the internet, but an industry professional.

Rob Paulsen.

At one point, Rob Paulsen claimed that the show was a rip-off of SpongeBob SquarePants, for some reason. Best case, he is unaware of how little braincells the animation community has, I mean why else does AniMat have a following? But look, if you think about either show, it is easy to see where either contrasts.

You compare this show to one where there're more differences than similarities if you think hard enough (which is apparently a sin in the animation community these days), and again, more obvious examples fly right over your head.

It has gotten to a point where people claim this is a rip-off based on Rob Paulsen's word alone. And with that, I'd just like to place myself on the hill I'm ready to die on. Rob Paulsen's an idiot. Either he didn't look deeper into where the claims come from, or he just wants to look cool for animation fans. Either he's stupid, or does not have any grasp on grander implications. He was the same guy who agreed to have any part in Doug Walker's career... I can't think of anything else.

Or maybe SpongeBob fans aren't very bright. I mean, they can't even detect sarcasm, and they have idiots like MoBros and LambHoot assing it up without remorse. A lot of shit has happened with the SpongeBob fandom over the past few years, and Rob Paulsen gave them more ammunition with the most baseless idea yet.

I'm harping on this because it's dangerous to hold something against the show based on one man's word alone. It's one guy's word, we don't know his philosophy or reason for saying these things, and if it's a joke it would be spread so much that people would forget the meaning it originally had. I mean, for instance, Brian Posehn only dunked on Nickelback because they were overplayed on the radio, and you can fill in the blanks.

Final Thoughts

On any other day, this would just be an incredibly obnoxious show that is rightly ragged on, for better or worse. However, when people decide to base their views of it on what another said, it ruins the prospect, because half the time the grander context is sorely missed. I don't care what Rob Paulsen says, his word is meaningless because it was done for validation rather than seeing what he has done.

This is just a case of favoritism and ignorance. If this was considered a Camp Lazlo rip-off then that would be fine as that and this have too many similarities to ignore. To whoever got those crazy allegations going, I hope their career is as troubled as Cam Clarke's.

Venting About the Chris Pratt Biz

 Remember the days when Sonic fans whined about Jason Griffith? It's a few years late, but I never thought we'd get a pseudo sequel, one that is even more petty than that was.

I'm doing this because I'm awaiting feedback on a rough draft, and I got time.

So, a new Mario movie was announced and a trailer dropped not too long ago. There's a little stink going on with it, and it got me thinking, oh this is by Illumination are people gonna hate on it for that alone? Is this gonna be like a meme where the Sonic movie trumps it? I wish it were either two, it would make more sense.

But no, the big takeaway people got from an otherwise interesting trailer... is one particular voice actor.

Chris Pratt was cast as Mario, understandable, as any film needs big name actors in order to get audiences in on name appeal. But of course, people lost their shit, guess we can't go one year with one movie getting ran through the dirt over something so minor.

People got butthurt because Charles Martinet wasn't cast as Mario in this, and they have absolutely no sense of self-awareness about it. They think it's a big huge crime that Mario, shock and horror, has a different voice. Just wait till they watch the old Mario cartoons, they'll have a heart attack I'm sure.

I don't care what Chris Pratt's take on Mario is like, he's just doing what he is directed to do and clearly trying his best. How was he supposed to know how nuts many Mario fans are? I'm sorry, but a lot of them are taking this way too far and I needed to go that route.

Where does this stack up to the Sonic voice actor drama from years ago? Well let's look at it like this, when people complained about the voice actors, I can kinda see where they're coming from. The cast change happened only due to the death of Deem Bristow, and SEGA thinking it would be cheaper to have the cast from 4Kids dub of Sonic X handle future titles. 4Kids had already begun to build up a negative reputation, and I can imagine some saw it as an extension of that. But since then the tides have turned and many of the 4Kids cast members are seen as the superior actors to the characters they voiced.

What's the excuse for Chris Pratt drama? Chris Pratt is voicing Mario in the upcoming movie, that's it. He hasn't replaced Charles Martinet in the games, you can choose whether or not you watch the movie, it has absolutely no impact on the games and can be easily ignored.

I'm sorry, but it's a petty complaint no matter how you slice it, even if the voice turns out to be bad, whining about voice acting? This isn't 2007, and it reminds me of PowerPuff Girls, who try to start one crisis after another.

Sure it was great the Sonic movie staff managed to fix the animation, but I feel that as a caveat, it gives people the idea they can bully movie producers into making them change things they don't like. If you had to resort to changing things you don't like with AI or whining about a voice actor, there's only one thing I can say.

Cope.

Scenes I Misremembered

A long time ago, I talked about movie scenes that occurred differently than I remembered, but a lot of you probably never heard of that. Nuff said, I'm gonna go over stuff from cartoons that I remembered differently, whether I didn't focus on the finer details or something else. These are gonna go by quick, some at least.

Spoiler warning

Mucha Lucha: Chinche

Remember this show? Mucha Lucha is considered to be the first television cartoon show animated in flash, by people who never heard of John Callahan's Quads. Anyway, I used to watch this show a lot when I was younger on Cartoon Network, and it's pretty good. This episode was released in the show's first season. I remember watching it for the first time, I had to leave the room for a few seconds, and from then all I got from this episode was that The Flea was a jerk to his cousin, and he hated him for plot's sake.

But when I returned to this episode years later, it was the exact opposite. I left the room around the time The Flea went through a prank where an elephant was released from a gift Chinche gave him. At first I thought it was just something that was in The Flea's imagination, but no, it was real. In fact, I completely spaced on Chinche intentionally icing out The Flea and attempting to steal his friends.

And then the climax. I did see the flashback to Chinche's birthday where The Flea gave him diapers. Hear me out, Chinche had worn diapers back then, but that was a secret, and because The Flea made it known to people accidentally, Chinche held it against him ever since, and of course they make peace. Looking back at this episode, it really made the show much better than I remembered it, and gave me some grander respect for what would be a more comedic character, The Flea cares deeply for his friends and family, he was the heart and the humor of the group, Buena Girl was the brains and the conscious and Ricochet was the brawn and the mouth.

CatDog: Dem Bones

This one's gonna be brief. This episode centers on Dog stealing the bones from a T-Rex exhibit while sleepwalking, and CatDog needs to return it lest they want to face museum jail time. During the climax where CatDog confront the museum guard while puppeting the fossil. I remembered it differently, in that I thought Cat was more into scaring the guard as payback for hassling them, but really, he was just trying to avoid getting caught and wanted to do a brief scare.

Hey Arnold!: Helga and the Nanny

In a review I did of this episode, I alluded to a false memory I had with this episode. I remember Helga arguing with a haggard old woman, and I assumed it was this episode, but obviously that wasn't the case. There was crossed wires between this and Crabby Author, best I can say.

King of the Hill: Hanky Panky

Now, I think a lot of people know how this went, but just to get you on track, Buck Strickland faces scrutiny from his wife, things are thrown out of wack and Buck's piece of ass Debbie wants to seduce Hank, and she dies at the end. What could this be leading to? Well, I thought Luanne died at the end. Both she and Debbie were blondes... and this seems embarrassing.

The only other Debbie I knew was the one from Wild Thornberries, so younger me assumed all cartoon blondes were named Debbie, so I was like, shit, they killed off "Debbie" (Luanne), if this actually happened, that would've made King of the Hill interesting, in that they jumped the shark higher than The Simpsons did.

But obviously, this didn't happen, hence my shock that Luanne was alive and well. If she could survive a propane explosion, she could survive anything, but to be fair... rest in peace Brittney Murphy.

Invader Zim: First Episode

I never saw much of Invader Zim growing up, so naturally I wasn't able to really soak in the show's humor, wherever it applied. This is one of two episodes I will go over. For the first episode, when Dib lost at the end I assumed he was hauled away by Zim's Roboparents. But chances are I mixed this up with the conclusion of that one episode of Teen Titans where Robin goes to the mountains to train with an old master.

For the actual ending, Dib's weapon of choice was destroyed, and he just gave up. It was funny, and established the show's firm balance between darkness and hilarity. To be fair, I didn't see this episode as much when it was new.

Invader Zim: Dark Harvest

Yep, the big one, depending on who you ask. There were a couple of things I didn't remember correctly. Firstly, what happened to Torque. I had assume Dib was gonna try and find a secret contact, but Zim murdered him. Then I thought, wait a second, nobody except Gretchen likes Dib. Nope, turns out Dib lost an otherwise apathetic Torque and Dib's realization was more comedic given the circumstances. It also didn't dawn on me why there were feathers, then lol, pigeon head.

Then the ending. I had assumed Zim took away Dib's vocal cords and made him sound like a cow... past me was not very bright. I didn't know the theme of the episode but Zim was stealing organs to clear a physical due to his anatomy being a giveaway he wasn't human. But, here's the actual thing. Lungs were the last thing Zim needed, he took one of Torque's, and he took one of Dib's, having replaced everyone's organs with random items, and for Dib, a tipping cow toy was the replacement for him.

I assumed Dib couldn't speak, but it turns out, yes he could, the only reason he made the cow noise was because, lungs are needed to breathe, and the cow toy was it. Once more, it was funnier than I remembered it, and I love the show for it.

Odd SpongeBob Nightmare

I have weird dreams, some of which involving cartoons, otherwise standard dream weirdness. I had one where SpongeBob and Patrick travel to Rock Bottom for some reason, and as they descend, their faces become more distorted. Well it turns out this was built on a forgotten memory. This was actually me remembering an episode of Rocko's Modern Life, Carnival Knowledge, where Rocko and Heffer ride a roller coaster and the g-force leads to the faces I saw in my nightmare.

I rarely ever saw Rocko's Modern Life back then, have mercy how times do change.

Bonus: The Simpsons: Various Scenes

This wasn't substantial enough to justify a full section, and a lot of them are the same. To sum up, I thought most scenes in The Simpsons were shorter than they actually were. Some examples include the climax of the hockey game in that episode, Marge's flashbacks in the aerophobia episode and the fate of Ozzie Smith in Homer at the Bat.

Obviously, these were longer than I recall, and that sums that up.

The Worst Classic Simpsons Episode

So, long ago I have made a few posts giving some choice words to particular classic episodes of The Simpsons. Now, I'm sick to the back teeth of people complaining about the newer seasons, but I didn't just single those episodes out spitefully. Though looking back, I was incredibly out of line. I'm sorry The Cartridge Family, I should've known the moral was that Homer Simpson was the kind of person who shouldn't own a gun. I'm sorry Bart Gets Hit By a Car, I misconstrued the climax and assumed Marge willingly bungled a settlement. I'm sorry Moaning Lisa, the a segment was the best thing while the b segment was incredibly underwhelming. I'm sorry There's No Disgrace Like Home, you were only the tip of the ice burg when it came to favoritism toward dysfunctional families, thank you Casa Paradisio and Malcolm in the Middle.

And I just hate A Car in Every Garage, Three Eyes on Every Fish on the grounds of being too on the nose with political sentiments, of course it would err toward one direction over the other.

In truth, there is only one truly detestable episode of The Simpsons during its peak years. One that still pisses me off to this day, and every time I think about it, it gets worse. And that episode, is War of the Simpsons. It was written by John Swartzwelder, one of the more heralded writers of The Simpsons. I'm sure I've seen some of his other episodes at some point, but because of his reputation, I need to hold him to that standard, and John, I am disappointment.

Right off the bat, this episode is off. The premise is that Homer and Marge go to a marriage conselor retreat after Homer gets drunk and makes an advance on Maude Flanders. Does that seem like something Homer Simpson would do? After the events of Homer Badman later on, I'd say the woman who never heard of Homer Simpson had a hell of a time ghost writing this episode, after going back in time of course.

This has the same level of off as There's No Disgrace Like Home, in terms of established personalities that would radically change over the years, but that had the excuse of being made in the first season, when the writers were trying to lay the foundation. Even the visuals seem off, too many dynamic angles that make this feel like a retelling of a Creepypasta. I found a scene from this episode online, and I had to pull out after four seconds because my gut sank for how quickly things escalated.

If you want a good Homer drunk flashback, Homer's Night Out is the superior choice for some hilarious absurdity.

After that, it's all fluff. There's an uncomfortable scene with Marge venting her fustrations, wow, and this was only within the second season, it's almost as if it was just forced in for the sake of having a conflict, and if I don't like the person I am supposed to be siding with, you have a horribly executed episode. Homer decides to go fishing and catch an elusive catfish, oh gee, I wonder if this episode is gonna end with Homer giving up the catfish to please his cunt of a wife- that's exactly what happened.

You know, for a show that built itself on smart humor and subversion, this is as by the numbers as you can get, in terms of conflict and resolution. It would've been much better if Homer got rid of the fish and he didn't have to.

"Okay, I would rather get rid of the fish, and so goes that problem!"

"I actually wanted you to be open to resolve our problems and save our marriage."

"D'oh!"

Or perhaps the fish could talk and give them both advice to better fix their marriage. Or perhaps Homer could twist it to Marge driving him to drink and both would realize they're both destructive to one another, and would work to fix things.

What we got here was just hollow. Keep in mind, both had faced trouble with their relationship before. Not once. Not twice. Not thrice. Some Enchanted Evening, The Mysterious Voyage of Our Homer, possibly more before or after. The fact that there is more marital dysfunction that occurs after this, the fact that Homer's alcoholism is played for comedy more often and rarely shows the same results as what occurred earlier in the episode, and the fact that the only time Homer would ever go as far as sexual assault was through a pure coincidence, it shows how worthless this episode is. What can we take away from this? Well, I guess this episode reflected the show's misandry. The show has always been liberal.

Lisa the Simpson has more worth than this episode, at least there it reflected Lisa's degradation, and at most just served as an ego boost. Every time I go back to this episode, it is more and more painful, and if it were up to me, at least I'm entitled to half of her shit. Just because such attitudes are justified that doesn't make it any more pleasent. I had more fun watching most of the newer episodes of The Simpsons than this, I knew where I stood with those, and I'm referring to pre-season 20 stuff definitely, but some later season stuff applies as well.

I was gonna show some select quotes from a blog that reviewed this episode, but I decided not to, so there's my explanation, the end. It sucks.

Teen Titans Review: Movie Night One

 This episode is interesting to me, in that when I decided to seek out the show on the internet, this was the first episode I looked for. Although I was opposed to horror back in the day, I actually remember really liking this episode, as if it predicted my growing development of like for the horror genre. Is there anything actually wrong with this episode? Well, let's go over it piece by piece.

Episode Transition

The episode starts with Toon4Thought terrorizing a video store, this was before Twitter became as much as a twinkle in Jack Dorsey's eye. Okay, poor joke, but I really don't like the guy, anyone in the cartoon community frankly, and Control Freak is the perfect caricature of how overly passionate fanboys can be.

The titans go to stop him, obviously do, the Cyborg eating enemy gag was a highlight for me because he's the most entertaining character in the show IMO and for their efforts they are given a free copy of a horror movie, and it's the ever typical so scary we don't even see what's happening on screen, but take our word for it. Not that it has any consequence to episodes that have these, I mean The Bernie Mac Show did something like this, and it was one of my favorite episodes of the show.

Anyway, the stoic Raven is pushed into a corner when she is accused of being afraid of the movie, and the crux behind what happens next is a spoiler so I'm not saying anything on it yet. I will say however that shit begins to turn weird, gradually, for instance, how does a cymbal crashing monkey activate, by itself? And keep in mind I'm questioning something that is actually realistic. I mean to be fair this monkey looks far less freaky than what they would normally look like, nice subversion I guess.

So anyway, we get our plot, the titans begin disappearing one by one, and one thing I kinda like is that if you pay close enough attention when seeing it a second time, you can get a better understanding of the twist, and I guess I'll say it now. Raven is the source of all of this, she has her anxiety pent up and it is coming all out, and the order in white the titans get taken away actually makes sense when you think about it.

Beast Boy is taken away first because he is otherwise the most annoying and Raven was annoyed he would accuse her of being scared. Robin was taken next only because he came close to cracking the code, and I guess Starfire's annoying enough that Raven would take any opportunity. It's actually kinda clever when you think about it, and at least compared to the initial part of the Trigon saga, the visuals in this episode are genuinely creepy, although the resolution, while making sense, seems a little predictable, like no shit she should confront her fear and admit to being afraid to take down the menace.

And though the show falls into a common web of things being resolved almost completely, the fact Raven was behind this actually makes it feel more logical, if she were behind all of this, of course the Titans wouldn't be taken far.

Final Thoughts

This is honestly one of my more tolerable episodes, it had an interesting idea or at least executed itself as good as it should've, along with some genuinely creepy moments. I want to favor episodes otherwise in a vacuum, because the show doesn't force any weight onto you and thus you would question things the more you think about more serious episodes.

For a little bonus, the episode got me thinking about Beast Boy being taken first. One time, I saw a tweet claiming Beast Boy was African American, basing it solely off of the Teen Titans cartoon, and there was Titans that made Starfire African American. It's ironic how Starfire was used in an episode allegorizing racism, while Beast Boy being taken out first reminds me of the "black guy always dies first" trope in horror. Maybe that's why, or maybe I'm hung up on Troq, who knows?

Teen Titans Review: Russian Captain America

 Before I get into this, I want to make something clear. I'm well aware Red Star is an actual character in the DC universe, but whether or not his backstory in the show is consistent with that in the comics is something I'm not too sure about. I will view the episode in a vacuum as a result.

One thing I have noticed about many of Teen Titans' characters is that many are... derivative, to say the least. Now sure, they are their own characters, but for some you gotta wonder. Aqua Lad? Any connection to Aqua Man? Bumble Bee, kinda reminds me of Wasp. Mala, I was gonna say he was just an edgy clone of Gorilla Grodd, but holy shit, both are their own characters in the comics. They even have their own human torch, who I have a feeling was favored so heavily by 20th Century Fox, they contacted Michael B. Jordan then and there.

Now I'm not saying DC was begging for a lawsuit, but it's fair to question how far inspiration can be stretched. Now you're probably wondering why I'm starting out with this. Simply put, there was an episode that had a Russian Captain America. He's known as Red Star, but previously Starfire until he had to change his name due to the known Starfire already having the title.

They have an entire episode dedicated to him basically, so let's get into it, or more into the character because little else of the episode sticks with me.

жопа на линии

The titans travel to Russia to take on a threat, but we first get introduced to a gentle creature, who we know we'll get to know more of later on.

At some point, the titans get separated and Starfire is rescued by Red Star, where we get some backstory. Tell me if this is familiar.

The weakest link in the army is selected to take part in a super soldier program, and is transformed into the greatest Ameri- I mean Russian soldier. They were reeeeeeeeeal subtle here. Something about incorporating elements of Captain America into a character from a country that has not only been at odds with the US since World War II and has laid seeds for further conflict with their attacks on Ukraine, I dunno does this seem wrong to anyone?

Look, Russia has lost any opportunity for sympathy these days, so perhaps this episode just aged like milk in terms of sympathizing with Russians.

Although, I'll give them some credit, they do something different with Red Star. He confines himself in his base due to his energy being unstable. He has to drain himself every now and again to keep himself from going nuclear. I mean you could say Russia tried to compete with the US, who had turned their loss in the space race against the Russians, and they wound up making a super soldier program that proved to hold consequences.

Red Star is an interesting character in principle, but it's hard not to see where the Captain America comparisons lie. And that's really all I can get out of this episode, everything else I forgot about. They deal with a big threat and Red Star opts to sacrifice himself by using all of his energy, then he flies up into space and becomes... his name.

And that's It

Red Star overshadowed the episode for me, there was nothing about it I recalled other than scenes with him, and that's a bad thing because he overshadows the main roster for me in terms of interest. I would've written him off as a Captain America rip-off here, but I can see where it would work given the tension between the US and Russia. Heck, if they were not opposed to crossovers, perhaps we could've got a good comic book where the Russians create their own Captain America and both super soldiers spar.

I'm not even gonna say that this is a bad episode, because I don't remember enough of it to judge it. Aside from one thing, we get a typical gross food gag, and that seems to be a common takeaway for the show when it comes to anime tropisisms, food, and over the top expressions. 

Teen Titans Review: Puberty(?) One

It's been ages since I did a cartoon review. I want to do this to show I'm not dead and because I want to relive some old memories, and what better way to do that than by taking the piss out of Teen Titans again?

I had stopped reviewing episodes of the show because I wore out my choices more egregious episodes, and thus I could not offer any meaningful feedback to episodes I simply didn't have any connection to.  But the more I thought about it, some came back into my conscious, so this may not be the only new episode review you'll see.

So I don't forget, I may cover the Red Star episode next time, and perhaps the movie night episode and the Atlas episode.

Today, I'm gonna cover that one episode where Starfire got these bizarre changes, I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be an allegory for puberty, but let's find out, while I also throw shade at Starfire some.

Episode

The structure of this episode is unique, in that it is carried out in a storybook fashion; a narrator provides the details, well mostly. The story behind this is that Starfire gets a big ass pimple, and true to her character, she is flagrantly unaware of human customs and thus would not understand that everyone gets pimples... although to be fair that is fucking gargantuan. So, maybe I'm just an asshole.

There is one weird thing I noticed about this episode, even as a kid. In some scenes, characters' eyes are weird. This is noticeable on Beast Boy and Raven, where their eyes are less like the anime-type, and more like the Timmverse type (for reference, Alfred Pennyworth in Batman TAS and that one episode of Static Shock)

It wasn't for a sight gag, and as far as I know never happened anywhere else. I don't know what happened with this and why they did it, but it was weird. The first time I watched it, I cut out after the bathroom scene, and it always felt like some kind of fever dream to me, moreso than Whatever Happened to Robot Jones.

So to be fair, Starfire confides with Raven over the growth and she basically shares my impulse sentiment, that it's no big deal. But for the sake of a plot, things get worse. They always get worse, as more stuff happens to Starfire and she tries to hide it. As it happens, I'm like, what is the angle here? Is it just in a vaccum? I mean to be fair, why not have it where each Titan goes through a weird scenario and it is all just in a vaccum, it'd make for some good diversions from the action.

During a fight with Plasmus, who if you didn't know, would get his redesign in this episode after getting exposed to more toxic waste, and even in spite of this, he is still able to turn back to normal when he is not awake, and this has never been explained in the show, do I look like the kind of guy who reads comic books? It's clear this show has a certain niche in mind, but if we have to read comics just to understand the characters, though many of them were changed for the show, you'd be hung up on a lot of confusing details.

But to this show's credit, as I saw the new Plasmus first, it was a good thing I saw this episode after that so I wasn't caught off too much.

Anyway, the fight, and Starfire winds up getting exposed and in a bizarre twist... her fears are well founded as she is laughed at by everyone. Okay, I have always felt the show takes the obvious routes when it comes to most things and rarely ever tries to subvert expectations, because when they do, it leaves me confused or agitated.

The reason they did this was to give justification for Starfire leaving the planet with no reservations, but because they needed to fill more time, they had to include that scene, and drag it out a bit, lest they wanted to subliminally voice their contempt for Starfire. And yeah... she's a mess. I hate to know what she was like in the comics, because it seems here she was lobotomized considerably and I cannot take the character seriously. It is especially a problem when we get to episodes like Troq, where the emotional weight lies on her shoulders, and yeah, as someone who understood The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman, the racism allegory flew right over my head, but to be fair the greater implications of Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle also did.

I bring up Troq, because I feel like this episode might've also served as an allegory for a real world occurrence. Puberty. The mutations Starfire goes through occur for no particular reason, at least that's how it would seem at first, but when we get there. Starfire travels to a distant planet for solitude, and comes across a mysterious woman whose eyes suggest she has something to hide, and we go into a favored trope in action shows.

An exposition dump.

The puberty theory comes into play when the woman goes into a Tamaranian phase, one that is completely normal, but oh shit, we still have a few minutes of run time, let's have this woman turn out to be a cannibal and up the anti on the phase by having Starfire rendered helpless in a cocoon. I know they needed something to push the plot along, but it feels kinda... rough. As if the writers were backed into a corner multiple times in desperate need of pushing things along.

Starfire leaving earth? Make everyone laugh at her and not feel welcome. The cause? Relegated to an info dump on a growth cycle related to her planet we didn't know about until now. The climax? Have Starfire immobilized as we get a twist antagonist that happens to eat her kind. With the weird storybook framework and the sudden crash into a standard episode format, it feels as though it's two concepts tacked onto one another. At first it wants to be an oddity, another it wants to not be, and I'm complaining because it just wasn't implemented well, they had to commit to one idea or another to get something to work.

Starfire makes it through the phase and is rid of her new features, save for the ability to shoot beams from her eyes, if they debuted here. One thing I'll give the episode credit for is that the seeds for the enemy's demise here is handled well. We kew there was a venus fly trap in this episode, that's what kills her, and everyone returns home with one last attempt at a joke. Chicken pox.

Final Thoughts

Compared to other episodes I covered, I kinda prefer this. It has an interesting idea that wasn't considered, to have a brief anthology where each Titan goes through something weird, perhaps have it themed around elements of teen life or growing up. While I probably wouldn't have liked what they came up with, it would've been interesting at least.

That said, the entire episode felt off... for the first act at least before normalcy was re-established. I feel like the writers gave up at some point, either that, or they included the weird stuff in order to help bolster the run time. You can tell when something is bolstered by how inconsequential most of its elements are. Now, did they actually bolster? Probably not.

I just feel like they could've gone about the puberty element better, like this is setting up for a longterm change, but Starfire returns almost entirely to normal physically, ignoring the eye lasers. It's as if the writers wanted to keep things from changing way too much, as if they would lose audiences over any inconsistencies. The fact things return to some shred of normality by the end of many episodes and arcs lend heavy credence to this. Now look, even Danny Phantom implemented changes in character designs, lest they feared Starfire's design would kill or strengthen- not gonna finish.

For the first time, I'm really just mildly disappointed with an episode of the show. And that's all I really have to say. See ya.

The Evolution of OneUpGamer

 So a while ago, I wrote a post relating to KingMasterReview and his review of that crappy Sonic port for the GBA. I pointed out how it was a near verbatim copy of a review Spax3 made back then, and how much of an influence he had on the guy, thus getting him tarred time after. I had assumed he was the bottom of the barrel, but one day, I got curious, and I wanted to see if I could find a review made by another lesser individual.

I had thought his old videos were removed, but it turns out that wasn't the case. After watching the one review I recall, folks...

I feel like screaming right now, so what better thing to do it to than a a good ol' bad video? Videos. Okay 

One Up Gamer

Oneupgamer, real name Nicholas Friesen, came into the fold in 2009. This was during the advent of the Irate Gamer Sucks blog, when DLAbaoaqu was very popular, when DJCuell managed to get away with ripping DLA off, and this guy came about.

Nicholas originally made reviews of NES titles, mostly those based on 80s movies, and for a time a lot of his old reviews were unavailable. The channel was up, but he had hidden his old reviews, until one day he decided to honor his past because he had managed to carve a better name for himself. He was mercifully not included on Encyclopedia Dramatica's list of Video Game Reviewers, you may think because he was a kid at the time, but VIB113 was an exception, don't diss Contra goddamnit, but keep VIB in mind.

When it came to AVGN worship, age wasn't a big deal to people, as this kid got it up the ass through commentaries. These days, his comment sections are closed on his older reviews, but given how broken YouTube's notification system is, it makes small things unavoidable, no matter how hard you try. Maybe that's why one particular movie has become so contaminated to me, I can't help but see red with it, literally and figuratively.

Technical Stuff

Oneupgamer's unique, in terms of his production quality. Let me explain. Let's pretend there's no such thing as the Angry Video Game Nerd, wouldn't that be awesome. The quality of game reviewers at the time would always vary.

Some would incorporate decent production value mixed with filmmaking experience, such as Alexander4488.

Some would be low budget, high concept and yield some interesting results for whatever they had at their disposal, such as Irate Gamer and Spax3.

Some would use basic practical effects but display some basic editing and acting fundamentals (showing footage and reactions), like NC17 Productions, KingMasterReview, you know.

Some would do let's play style reviews, like Stanburdman and Hellsing920.

Some would do rant style reviews, where they would point the camera at the screen, like VIB113.

Now, what does Nicholas do? What do you get when you cross VIB's resources with Irate Gamer and Spax3's tendency to make sketches? And all you have is a camera that may very well be a cellphone?

When I saw Nicholas' older videos, I was floored with how cheap they are. Want to know how cheap it is? Title cards are represented through filming sheets of paper with the show name and creator credit written in black marker. That cheap. I've heard of DIY, but this... I'll give you an idea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oc7JZtdE3x4

When it comes to the reviews themselves, honestly he's a hell of a lot more blatant of ripping off AVGN than they made out others to be. He has stated lines and jokes by AVGN near verbatim, and it is especially common in his Nightmare on Elm Street review. He also happens to hate LJN, probably because James does, and it's his word against anyone else's. So much was foresaken for the sake of comedy.

But back on topic, I hate it when reviewers lift points from others verbatim, because half the time they have no idea what basis the points had to begin with. All they see is an obvious point they could use, and they'll run with it as much as they could. When you find out who made the point first, it's hard to see anyone else make it. I can understand why a lot of reviews got shit back then, because yeah, it's not right to ride off of existing material for your own gain. Some were more shameless than others, some just sucked that hard.

Instinctively, when you find yourself without a budget, you'd want to keep your review as simple as possible. But Nicholas had different plans. He incorporated sketches into his reviews, and yeah, he was a one-man show. These lack the cheese of Irate Gamer, the earnest nature of CNASN, they're too narrow, boring, and at most are non-sequiturs, the sketches in the former two at least fit the nature of their respective shows. Gaffs are very noticeable, and given that this is a basic editing job, there's no excuse. VIB113 had the excuse of coming up with what he said on the spot, because this was being recorded live, and KingMasterReview was already known for his rambles, and even he did a better job in hindsight.

He manages to make arguments AVGN did in his reviews, but completely avoided some stuff, like how the radio would wake you back up when you fall asleep in the Nightmare on Elm Street NES game. You can tell he borrowed points from AVGN, as he points them out before they actually occur. He was able to play that Bill and Ted NES game before James did, wish I would've made the claim James ripped Nicholas off, people's heads would explode, right after their asses catch fire.

But that was then

I would leave it off here, that he was just a kid with no hindsight making stuff in earnest, but for many, they can't remain gone forever. I mean I never thought VIB113 would come back, yet he did, and is otherwise still going on. Nicholas stayed on, but popped up sporadically, and he gradually got better, even earning a sign of approval from DLA.

I saw a review he posted of Bugs Bunny's Crazy Castle and folks, I was amazed. Along with lampooning AVGN fanboys over rip-off stigmas, which for the record is quite satisfying once you realize how petty it was, his review was concise, well detailed (I had no idea most of the Crazy Castle games were repurposings of previous licenses, and only two were built from the ground up), and any odd jokes caught me by surprise.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U1FUINZ6m9M

It seems he pops up every now and again, but things had looked up for him immensely, and he can at least leave off on a good note. For a time, he had his older videos unavailable, but decided to bring them back. It's a good thing, because now people can look back at his older stuff, knowing he had improved very much since.

We got to a point where YouTube can become nostalgic, so it's interesting to see how someone has changed over the years, and look back on the past with fondness, no matter how many quirks it has.

3 People You Never Knew Had NewGrounds Accounts

 In the early to mid 2000s, before YouTube was anything more than an idea, chances are you’d make yourself known on sites like deviantArt, FanFiction.net or NewGrounds. The latter has always been unique, as it was one of the earliest spots you can post video content of any kind. It is where the likes of Eddsworld and Smosh got their start, because where else could they share their stuff?

Now, you’d be surprised who started out on NewGrounds, so today, I’m gonna go over three users who are known everywhere else, those who started out on NewGrounds. You may recognize some, but not everyone does. Let's begin.

#3: AnimatedJames

Remember AnimatedJames? That animator on YouTube who was outed for having a fart fetish? Needless to say, he handled it in the worst way anyone could. Accepting it is fine, but being a douche about it is another thing. There was absolutely nothing that can save James in any regard, he had crappy art direction, bare basic ideas and humor and a demeanor that would suggest a big lack of staying power.

James has been gone for quite some time, I hope he wasn't driven to the end, but at the same time, he cannot make it back to the internet. I don't even want to see what C-Students would've been.

Anyhow, back to the topic at hand, James made a NewGrounds account back in 2008, this was his earliest account anywhere as far as I'm aware. A clue to its existence came from him mentioning a precursor to C-Students, Chaos High. On NewGrounds, this was split into two episodes, and uploads exist on YouTube.

So, with expectations that can't possibly go any lower, okay James, enlighten me.

https://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/508710

One thing I like is that James doesn't deny the existence of the extended Sonic cast, everyone's here, even Big the Cat. Of course, everyone is reduced to a benign high school archetype. Almost forgot to mention, this is a high school type parody, more common than you think. It's so common, GothNebula did it. Also, Good Charlotte. Frankly, Clique is better.

I mean so far it's not horrible, beyond the fact that you can give these lines to just about anyone, and nixing the names, it would not compromise the plot too much, so far at least. I've noticed some serious gaffs, such as a scene where Tails is talking, and all that's seen is his mouth for no reason. Also, James seemed to have a bizarre habit of throwing in sound effects at the end of every punchline.

So basically, Sonic is trying to get Amy off his back, hijinks ensue, I question if the roles stated at the start are held or are just wishful thoughts. Sonic throws a ball at Amy's head with such intensity that you don't see it fly out of his hand.

Of course Amy walks out of trajectory and the ball hits the defacto bully in this, Vector, who near as I could tell is older than most of the other characters. I mean then again, Ed, Edd n' Eddy allowed two literal kids to attend high school.

Sonic places a call to Mighty the Armadillo, for some extra trivia, and now I feel like bringing up an inconsistency. James uses timecards with narration, but sometimes the cards don't appear, it's just a black screen with narration. Also, Sonic gets punched by Knuckles over a conversation apparently.

And the mouth animation against a plain background is back with a vengeance, as not even the background could remain consistent. Also Shadow appears here, and I think James has honored Shadow's derailment a bit too much. Also Amy's hopelessly delusional, so business as usual then? And Sonic decides to go all... you know what, I don't even want to finish.

He made another one, but it's split into two parts, and I have no idea how long these would be. But for now, I just wanted to give you an idea on where James' content was at, before it became, quite frankly, worse. Do you want Sonic characters in high school? Or do you want some cringey nonsense?

#2: Spax3

Yes, Spax3 had a NewGrounds account. I'm not bringing him up out of habit. For some, Spax needs no introduction, but if you're curious, Dylan the Night Owl covers every major facet of the guy, complete with an interview.

Spax was originally known as Spaction3, but would rebrand to Spax3 soon after. He created his deviantArt and NewGrounds accounts in 2004, though by his own admission, he didn't have the skills for it, yet not one to back down, he produced a flash cartoon.

Revenge of the PBJ Banana: https://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/202665

Remember Peanut Butter Jelly Time? It was all over the place back then. When I saw this, as well as Spax's claims to not have any proper experience in flash, I didn't know what to expect.

So for this, Spax kills the PBJ banana, and we get an early voice role from him in that regard. The banana becomes a zombie, and is played through text to speech, thankfully not Speakonia, but rather iBook, which provides some variety to a dry collection of Speakonia videos (interesting fact, Spax did his work on Mac computers, iMovie is superior to Windows Movie Maker)

The banana sings the PBJ time song, and Spax kills himself, and that's it. It was short, simple, and for something made in 2004, I've seen far worse. For something made with little experience, this, like most of his old videos, have some charm to them. It's not that they were bad necessarily, it was just that a lot of his views bled into most of them, and his personal conduct just wasn't there, heck there are still some serious bumps, given what's going through his head.

But I'm happy to say I prefer this to Chaos High, for one thing it's shorter and less complicated. A lot of Spax's signature elements were present at this point, from him referring to himself as Alex/Ed, to the hoodie, to the copyright info. Also, I found some obscure trivia behind Spax's name and previous history. Apparently, he got his start on FanFiction.net in 2003, and he posted under the name SP Action Extreme 2 Noid. We got the meaning behind A.S.N. in Cartoon Network A.S.N. (Alex/Ed show network), and I think I found the meaning behind the name Spax (SP Action Extreme, SPAction, SPAeX), I guess the three reflects the year he joined the internet.

#1: Soulja Boy

Bet you didn't see this coming. The rapper, yes, the rapper, has a NewGrounds account. People seem to forget Soulja Boy had his roots with online content, running profiles on MySpace, YouTube, even deviantArt.

He joined in 2005, and actually has a few shorts in his collection, two are originals, two are based on his career. So I'm gonna go over an ample beginning, Super Damien.

https://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/253440

This is sorta like Dragon Ball Z, but with stick figures. But hey, this has some impressive animation, and shows the taste in music Soulja Boy had, would you ever guess he liked 36 Crazyfists and Slipknot?

He didn't realize his true calling, but I suppose hadn't it been for him, musicians online would never be taken seriously. Did you know Soulja Boy had the honor of being allowed to post a live action video on NewGrounds? The only other people to have this honor were the Numa Numa guy and Smosh I believe.

Final Thoughts

If there's one thing I learned, the shorter and sillier the flash, the better it is. Soulja Boy wins for the best short on the list, Spax made a surprisingly okay short given his lack of resources (but isn't that was James Rolfe is lauded for, constantly) and is at least honest about it, James... it's certainly James alright. Bringing you the high school experience, straight up, no nuance, but maybe it's better than his later stuff, who knows?

Know of anyone else who started out on NewGrounds?