Saturday, November 13, 2021

B-Sides: The Paper

 I've been on quite a roller-coaster with SpongeBob SquarePants lately. In spite of my general attitude and comments regarding the more incessant parts of the fandom, I will admit this, seeing the newer episodes for the first time on television, I actually hated them. But these days there's another issue I have with the fandom, well, beyond their immense simping. I feel like few people take into consideration that even the older seasons have their general flaws. I've seen some people disown another reviewer because how dare he say the first season wasn't as great as the other ones?

We know the show got pretty messed up around the sixth season, but, what if this was in the cards as far as the first season? Not as bad, but easily comparable, unsatisfying, and not as good as you recall?

Why is it this supposed atrocity went unnoticed for so long? Well this episode only comes along one month per year.

The Episode

Holiday episodes have always been pretty peculiar. Lest it's a half-hour special, the a-segment is dedicated to the holiday in question, while the b-segment is a regular episode that somehow keeps with the theme of the a-segment. I feel like they got this right with the Halloween episodes; the a-segment is set during the Halloween season, the b-segment is a particularly creepy normal episode.

SpongeBob SquarePants' M.O. on this is the strangest I have ever seen. The b-segments, beyond the Halloween episode, could be shown without their holiday counterparts and none would be the wiser. An April Fools Day episode is followed by a pretty regular episode, and an episode relating to Valentines Day is followed by... a piece of paper.

It's like the regular episodes, but you can only see it once, a few times if you're lucky, a year, in the shortest month on the calendar. Sounds interesting, but if the episode turns out to be a letdown, you'd be thankful you can just go online to watch it.

Still... The Episode

Squidward throws away a gum wrapper, SpongeBob waxes praise over it, constantly, bugs Squidward about whether or not he wants to keep it, Squidward is wrung dry by SpongeBob having fun with it, he winds up giving everything away, and it's all for nothing.

Kinda reminds of Squid Wood, you know, one of many episodes that people happen to hate. Squidward doesn't want to play with SpongeBob, SpongeBob constantly bugs him over wanting to do so, he make a ventriloquist dummy that people go nuts over, you get the picture. And yes, that accounts for a glut of the episode. Ironically, there was also a Squidward dummy in this.

Barring the quality, the similarities are uncanny between either episode. We had Squidward... why would I say it episodes as far back as the first season, they just weren't as common as they were until later on. I blame Camp Lazlo.

I can understand something like karma playing a role but... what did Squidward due to deserve all this? Was it for littering? If you don't throw out your trash someone will make it seem cool and cost you everything? That's an interesting approach to an anti-littering PSA I guess.

The jokes in this are kinda basic... almost... bland even. It's as if the second and third seasons were funnier than the first. If I get detractors for saying this, of course I would. Hooky even practically recycled a joke from Pickles, and that episode sucks balls too.

When the rules and limitations to paper are removed, it's not creative, it's plain lazy. Things happen with it for the sake of happening and pushing the plot along. You may be saying, "Well of course it's pushing the plot along, that's kinda the point." I dunno I feel there's much to be desired, more than just one-upping Squidward because.... because.

You could say Squidward brought it upon himself because he was desperate, but SpongeBob didn't help matters.

Final Thoughts

If it were up to me.... I'd scrap the concept entirely and replace the b-segment to a Valentines episode with SpongeBob falling in love with a girl, too bad the other characters had romantic plots in later episodes.

This episode is another example of an irritating nothing episode, and it yields many similarities to that infamous category of SpongeBob episodes, you know the one, no matter how much you wish to deny it. It was the way since the start, it just became more apparent later on.

People become so attached to the older seasons of a long running show, at times they become blind to whatever flaws the older episodes may have. It happened with Teen Titans, where the constant praise it received led me to become more aware to its flaws.

If you don't agree this episode is bad, can we at least agree that it's not very good?

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